Mama needs some e-book recommendations...

The big guy in red has gifted me a new Sony e-reader (among other things).  I already have several books on there, including an unauthorized version of my upcoming novel Wardroids (Santa really does watch you all the time, and go through the files on your computer), and some random ones my Dad added when I went over for Christmas dinner.  While it may take me until well after next Christmas to read all these, I also feel I should support my fellow authors by actually purchasing e-books.

This is where you guys come in.   Suggest a book that I might enjoy, or a book that you enjoyed, or a book that you wrote and want people to buy.  It doesn't have to be profound or life-changing, just entertaining is fine with me.  I like SF, but not exclusively.  I'm asking all of you, including the lurkers (really people, just say hi once in a while). 

Also if you know of any books that have movies based on them, let me know, since I have taken a pledge to read the book first.  I guess I'd better download "The Help" and "Hunger Games".

When I'm not reading books on my e-reader, I'll be playing my limited edition Klingon Monopoly game.  Board games are surprisingly popular in the Empire, although Monopoly is a bit controversial as it is seen as promoting Ferengi values.

Merry Christmas everyone!  (And thanks in advance for all the e-book recommendations)

Oh, Christmas Time

Having junked our artificial tree at the end of the season last year, yesterday we went on a mission to chop down a real one. We took a tractor ride into forest of pint-sized pines, whereupon a grumpy farmer told us he was only making one trip because the ground wasn't frozen enough. We looked at three different types of trees; green ones, blue ones, and more green ones.  Finally we settled on green.  We wandered through the rows of pines, rejecting some, picking out maybes and then forgetting where they were.  All the while Jadzia was kept in low spirits due to the cold, a lost candy cane, and general three-year-old crankiness.  We finally found the perfect tree (we got cold and hungry).  Adam sawed it down and then we bought hot dogs and chili at the farm store.

It's been a week of Christmas memories.  On Friday we had lunch with Santa at the community centre.  By we, I mean William and Jadzia. Santa doesn't feed grown-ups.  My children were the only ones who opted for food before seeing Santa. It meant that Jadzia had chocolate brownie up her nose when I snapped the Santa photo, but I don't think you can really tell in the picture.

Thursday was William's Christmas concert at his school. He chose a bright green shirt to wear and stood out beautifully.  His class recited a poem called "I don't want mittens for Christmas" and sang "Mittens and Gloves". Not exactly old chestnuts, but they did very well.  I was able to enjoy myself despite the overtired three-year-old on my lap, who wanted desperately to go on stage with her brother.

In other news, I was sort of tagged in a Christmas Meme (as part of my writing group) and it seems appropriate (appropriately lazy) to answer those questions here.

1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate?  Hot chocolate tastes better, but egg nog is more Christmassy. Never make hot chocolate with water. That's blasphemy (and not in a good way).

2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree? Both.

3. Coloured lights on tree/house or white? Coloured.

4. Do you hang mistletoe?  Nope.

5. When do you put your decorations up?Sometime in December/ when we feel like it.

6. What is your favourite holiday dish?Christmas log.

7. Favourite Holiday memory as a child? The memories I had this week are right up there.  I guess I`m not technically a child though.  So I`ll go with this one: My grandparents celebrated on Christmas Eve. On years that we stayed at their house, we would hide in the kitchen, then Santa would ring a bell.  We would run into the living room and all our gifts would be laid out.  We never saw Santa, and I swear the whole family was in the kitchen, all adults accounted for. It must have been the real deal.

8. When and how did you learn the truth about Santa? I consider myself a Santa Claus agnostic.

9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve?Except when we went to my grandparents, we usually opened Christmas morning. Although we got one gift (always a book and occasionally a book and pjs) on Christmas Eve.  My inlaws also celebrate Christmas Eve, so there is present opening at their house then, but at our house Santa`s presents get opened on Christmas Morning.

10. How do you decorate your Christmas tree? The Christmas decorations box pukes all over the tree and we call it done.

11. Can you ice skate?Since I was two.

12. Do you remember your favourite gift? My daughter, Jadzia. Born 5:15 am, December 25th.

13. What’s the most important thing about the Holidays for you? Family. Warm fuzzies.

14. What is your favourite Holiday Dessert?I told you! Christmas log.

15. What is your favourite holiday tradition?I love everything except the financial stress.

16. What tops your tree?A slightly dilapidated red star from an Ikea ornament set.

17. Which do you prefer giving or receiving? Both.

18. What is your favourite Christmas Song?I used to like `We Three Kings` because of the camels with sneakers.  `Santa Baby`is a good one.  Also `Here Comes Santa Claus`. Edit: Oh! I totally forgot about Tim Minchin's White Wine in the Sun, which is both funny and touching and very well captures the meaning of Christmas.

19. Candy Canes: Yuck or Yum?I can take them or leave them.

20. Favourite Christmas Show?Will Vinton`s Claymation Christmas Celebration which my family watched every year from the time it came out in 1987, until it faded into obscurity.

21. Saddest Christmas Song? Christmas songs should not be sad. They should be joyous.  Songs about war and hunger are okay as long at they are upbeat. There should never be any songs about a little boy using a sob story about his dying mother to scam someone into buying him an expensive pair of shoes.

Merry Christmas everyone!

Jadzia's 3rd Birthday Party

Before you have an aneurysm wondering where the time went, I must tell you that my Christmas baby won't be three for another few weeks. We had her party early for obvious reasons.  We did what we always do for birthdays.  We invited everyone she loves to our house and ate food while the kids played.

The most stressful part of a party is the before party clean-up.  My husband did most of that (yes, and you can't have him), while I prepared a cheese plate, a fruit plate, a veggie and dip plate, and spaghetti casserole. The kids helped me bake a cake. Jadzia asked for strawberry so I added strawberry jam to my usual half-butter half-icing sugar icing. The result was so sweet I got a sugar rush just from licking the spoon (and I have a fairly high tolerance).

We didn't plan any activities beyond eating and opening presents, but everyone had a great time anyway (or pretended to).  Jadzia's Babcia was there, and her Omi and Opa, her aunties, her uncles, her cousins, and her friends.

She got an obscene amount of gifts, and each one was carefully chosen by someone who has loved her since she was a baby.  I know from experience that the present a child is excited about when they open it, is not always the same as the present that she plays with on a daily basis.  She chose gifts in boxes over gifts in bags.  She didn't really care what was in them.

Until her friends had left, of course.

Just before bedtime we drove to that insanely decorated house on Spruce Street.  The perfect end to a perfect day.  (And to think, I still have leftover Brie).

Christmas Moments

Jadzia loved the underwear she got from my parents.  Sure she had toys to play with, but who needs them when you can sort and stack your big girl briefs and fill and empty a little gift bag over and over.

There's nothing quite like watching babies opening presents.  Violet's intense expression while tearing the wrapping was priceless. The presents inside the paper weren't nearly as fascinating.

William got a hotwheels track made for colour-change cars which involves a skull head with sponge brain, a little squirt gun to spray the cars, and several vats of water for the cars to fall in/ drive through.  He literally played with it all night. My Mom's table was so soaked that a small waterfall was gushing off the tablecloth onto the floor.

I should mention my Mom's Christmas log.  I look forward to this chocolately monstrousity all year and it never disappoints.  She also makes sticky toffee pudding, which is well received, but I find the caramel just gets in the way of the true meaning of Christmas: chocolate!  This year, my mom had eight Lindor bunnies to be Santa's reindeer.  Unfortunately, Jadzia snuck into the kitchen and quietly ate them all before they could decorate anything.

At 8 o'clock Christmas eve, Future Shop and Best Buy officially begin their Boxing Day sales and the whole family gathered around Dad's laptop to watch him attempt to buy an e-reader.  Eventually Jadzia convinced him to watch Elmo videos instead.  They also watched the video of Jadzia doing knock-knock jokes.

At the end of the night, William desperately wanted to have a bath to try out his new hotwheels bath toy.  He had a gigantic freak out when we told him it was too late (it was ten o'clock).   Luckily, it was Adam's turn to but him to bed.  According to Adam, William crashed immediately after his good night hug.


Jadzia's favourite toys Christmas morning were the Pez dispensers from the stockings.  Jessie for Jadzia, Buzz Lightyear for William, and Snow White for me.  Jadzia ate the two packages of Pez that came with hers and then ate half of mine.

There was a Christmas present under the tree for Adam that I did not purchase.  Proof of the existence of Santa Claus?  Anyway Adam took his giant remote control big wheel truck out in the snow with William to try it out.  They said it worked great, but the batteries didn't last long in the cold.

The whole family enjoyed playing with William's new lego set.  While Adam and I searched through the big bucket of parts to find tiny, highly specialized, pieces to build a fire truck and police station, the kids mostly enjoyed the sound of the pieces in the box.  Jadzia fished out a dozen tiny translucent coloured circles and carried them around the house.

Moments after I got Jadzia dressed to go to my in-laws, she got into Adam's Toblerone bar.  She walked up to Adam, hands covered in chocolate, her tiny little bite-marks all over the large chunk in her hand.
Adam:  "What the...."
Jadzia: "Chocolate!"
Miraculously, none got on her dress.

At my in-law's house, Jadzia loved eating her borscht, which is a delicious purple soup made from beets.  (I like it too).

William got a fairly elaborate robot track, from my in-laws.  My son is a little engineer and was able to figure out how everything works in only a few minutes (about as long as it takes me to figure it out).  The first robot kicks the car, launches it into the claw-launcher, causing the next car to speed towards the giant robot, who punches the building twice, once quickly and a second time with a slow-moving spring-loaded arm.  One car sails out of the building toward the end of the track and the other launches straight at the giant robot, breaking him in half! 

Of course it was also Jadzia's birthday, so she got a tiny icecream cake with candles to blow out.  She gets so excited at the whole Happy-Birthday-singing candle-blowing ritual, whether it's her birthday or not.

Christmassy Activities



Since my Christmas tree is up now, I've been inspired to do more Christmassing things.  This morning I got the kids into nice clothes and took them to see Santa.  As we were entering the mall I noticed that Jadzia had somehow managed to get pomegranate juice on her dress, even though I had fed them while they were still in their undies and pull-ups.  You can't see the stain in the picture, right guys?

Santa asked William and Jadzia what they wanted for Christmas.  William replied that he wanted Criss Cross Crash, his Hot Wheels toy request of the week.  Jadzia, who I was surprised answered the question at all, replied "Doggies!"  I only hope she doesn't mean a real one.

Jadzia started flipping out as soon as the candy canes ran out, but I'd promised William that we would stop at the Bulk Barn and get ingredients for a grahm cracker house.  Unwilling to accept the convention of purchasing candy before you eat it, Jadzia had a meltdown in the middle of the store.  I quickly grabbed the grahm crackers and icing mix, while William chose several candies for decoration.

After getting home and eating lunch, I was all gung ho to start the house construction.  I built Jadzia's house (minus the decorations) while William attempted to spread icing on one cracker.  William announced that he didn't want to build houses anymore and left the table.  He returned when I offered to build his house so he could decorate it. By the time I was done, Jadzia had calapsed her house and I had to rebuild it for her.  I showed William how to put icing on a candy so it would stick, but he refused to try it himself and instead instructed me on which candies to put where.  In between following William's commands, I arranged peanut M&Ms on Jadzia's house vaguely in the shape of a Christmas tree, and tried to stick on the gummy worms faster than she was eating them.

Here are the results of our efforts:

Christmasiffication Complete!

The worst labour, the best labour, the best Christmas present ever.

So even though I was in labour I got in as much Christmasing as I could, opening presents at my parents' place, then going over to my in-laws for their traditional Christmas eve dinner. At around 6, I decided it was time to high-tail it to the hospital. I'd been having contractions since the morning before and by this time I would describe them as intense, bordering on unbearable.

But at the hospital, the nurse did a poke-in-the-vagina test and said that I was only three centimetres, and they won't even admit people until they are at least four centimetres. No!!!!!! The nurse then suggested I wander around the hospital for an hour to get my cervix to open up.

I took a walk in the hall with my husband. Since it was Christmas eve, Santa Claus appeared and gave us candy canes. I should have asked him for an epidural, the only present I really wanted. Every three seconds (it seemed) I had to stop walking and hold onto my husband to handle my intense (but only 3-centimetres intense) pain.

We went back and another nurse poked my vagina and told me I was still only three centimetres and should go home. I burst into tears. The nurse then attempted to make me feel better by telling me what a big wimp I am. Apparently, these were actually "pretty mild" contractions and if I were in "good labour" my belly would be as hard as a rock and I would be in so much pain I wouldn't be able to talk. Call me a wuss, but I wanted an epidural before that happened.

I went home, had a bath, beared the unbearable contractions. My husband told me I wasn't a wimp, and that he was proud of me. I talked to my friend Becca on the phone, who told me that being a wimp makes me a better Mom. She also suggested I ask the hospital to prescribe me a sleeping pill. So I called the hospital and begged them to give me something. Based on the fact that I could still talk on the phone, the nurse didn't think that I was in pain enough, but tried to humour me by telling me to come back in to be vagina-poked again.

We went back to the hospital, where I puked all over the parking lot and wet my pants (pregnant women have no bladder control). I didn't mind too much because I thought this would earn me brownie points with the vagina-pokers who hold the key to the epidural. The nurse didn't seem to care about my wet pants and vomit breath, but when she poked my vagina this time I was between 4 and 5 centimetres. HA!

She admitted me and casually asked if I wanted an epidural. I wanted an epidural three hours ago!!!!! So after the epidural guy's coffee break (or whereever he was), I got some needles in my spine and my pain went away. It was midnight, and I really wanted to sleep. I wasn't feeling pain anymore, but I was shaking all over even though I wasn't cold. Not to mention the fact that I now had more tubes coming out of me than a borg drone. Anyway I couldn't seem to doze off.

Christmas morning, the nurse poked my vagina again and found that I was fully dialated, which is code for show time! She and Adam helped me hold my legs up to do a "practice push" but she quickly made me stop because she saw the head and I wasn't allowed to really give birth until my doctor was there. After my doctor did arrive, I was able to pop the baby out (along with some gross-looking life-giving juices) in hardly any time at all. Jadzia Victoria, my beautiful baby girl, was born at 5:15 am Christmas morning. She's the best Christmas present ever (though I've never had one that was quite so difficult to unwrap).

I only spent one night in the hospital (I would have left earlier except they needed some of Jadzia's newborn blood for their vampires). So now, instead of being a wimp, I look like a super-strong woman for being up and about such a short time after giving birth. So there!

Let the games begin

Yesterday, after William's bedtime drama, my head hit the pillow and I started having contractions. I didn't wake up Adam. At least, not intentionally. I read somewhere that the way you tell the difference between the El Fake-o Braxton Hicks contractions and real ones is that you can get rid of Braxton Hicks by changing positions. So I was moving around a lot. They seemed real, and were coming about every ten minutes. By morning, though, they had mysteriously disappeared.

I happened to have a doctor's appointment and told him all about my magic disappearing labour. He did his poke-in-the-vagina test and confirmed that I was 90% effaced and 2-centimetres dialated. In other words, I had not imagined it.

So I convinced Adam to stay home (although not much convincing was needed the day before Christmas). The doctor sent me to the hospital to do a non-stress test, which is where they hook my belly up to some monitors, like they're giving the baby a lie detector test. Then they gave me some juice and a jeopardy-style button to press whenever she moved. She's the most laid-back baby in history. We were there for 45-minutes (or 6 bucks and change parking), and she only moved when me and the nurse were poking at my belly. Anyway she passed the test, not a stressed out baby.

William stayed at my parents' house while we painted the town, going out for lunch, and then to a movie. My contractions started up again, but not with any consistancy. First they'd be ten minutes apart, then maybe 9, then 15, then I'd go an hour without feeling anything.

Today is Christmas Eve, and no baby has made an appearance. According to my stop-watch-keeper husband, my contractions are now six and a half minutes apart (I've had three while writing this blog entry).

My guess is my daughter's birthday will be today or tomorrow. It might be annoying to have your birthday overshadowed by Christmas, but I feel absolved of all guilt. She could have come at the beginning of December, she could have come in early January. Instead, she chose the biggest consumer holiday of the year.

Merry Christmas.

Santa Photo 2008

While William still isn't thrilled to meet the big guy in red, he didn't cry this time. However, I did have to hold him prisoner on my lap, making this year's Santa photo a family photo:


For more amusing Santa antics, here's a video of the event:


Listen carefully, at the end when William is playing with the ornaments, I say "Sweetie, Santa doesn't want you to touch his balls." Oops! Afterwards Santa told me I made his day with that line.

Deck the House

As you can see by this, the darkest picture ever, we put up our Christmas lights today. By "we" I of course mean my handy husband (he loves when people call him handy). I don't climb ladders, ever, even when not pregnant. This is the first time we've put up outdoor Christmas lights because, up until this year, we didn't have a house. Our first apartment didn't even have a balcony, and our condo was run by elderly people with persnickety rules about everything.

Now, as homeowners, we are officially festive.

Clay Time Fun Begins Tonight

For Christmas, my extra wonderful loving husband, signed us both up for a pottery and clay building course at the Burlington Art Centre. As a University of Toronto art and art history graduate, I've taken many an art course, and as a child growing up in Burlington, I've taken many a clay course at the BAC (though in my youth it was called the Cultural Centre). To date, however, I have yet to take an art course at the BAC with my loving husband. Should be extra fun.

My goal for this course is to create something so fabulous that I will keep it around for at least 15 years, breaking the records set by the heart-shaped smiley face jewlery box which I made in grade eight (and still use), and the clay elephant above our fireplace that I made in grade nine.

Later this week, on Wednesday to be exact, I'm going to my writers' group for the first time since before Christmas, so I've been busy reading all the stuff my colleagues have written over the break. Everyone seems to have had an explosion of creativity, even though most of them have real day jobs. Unfortunately, my own novel is dawdling along. I hate when writing is hard.

In other news Adam and I have finally taken down our Christmas tree. So the holidays are officially over.

Christmas in Review

It seems I haven't posted since last year, before most of the Christmas craziness began. Now it's the new year and my brain has already rotted away from playing all the new video games Santa brought us. So instead of using words I show you pictures. Okie Dokey?

(In no particular order)

There won't be snow in Africa this Christmas but... we saw this rhino enjoying the snow on boxing day. The zoo decided to change it's "Free on Boxing Day" policy to a "Half-price on Boxing Day" policy. We foiled their plan to charge us money though, by bringing the zoo passes that my parents got us for Christmas. Our friends Chris and Lisa came all the way from Ottawa to join the fun (unfortunately they had to pay).


When we got together just after Christmas, William and Aedan actually played together instead of existing in the same room with each other. Aedan has gotten so tall but, as you can see, William can still beat him up.


Here's a shot of William walking.



William and I opening presents at my in-laws' house on Christmas eve. Notice how William is tastefully showing his midrift? Very difficult to do when one is wearing a button-down dress shirt. Luckily William is only wearing the top half of a button-down dress shirt, with a vest sewn onto it. I swear, some baby clothing is so weird. Looks good though.

A slightly out of focus pic of our Christmas tree. The ornaments kind of migrated to the top to stay out of baby-reach.

This is what happens whenever someone tries to take William's picture. I swear we have about a million photos of him trying to grab the camera or simply giving the "ooo! I want that!" look. He takes after his Daddy.

Anyway it's late and my husband says it's my bedtime. Happy New Year!

Super Happy Nativity Scene

Hey, I got around to making a new X-mas flash afterall! I'm not usually this traditional but what's X-mas without a nativity scene?




Merry Christmas Everyone!

12 Days of Christmas...OR LESS!

I know it's hard to believe, at least for the snowless citizens of B-town, Ontario, that Christmas is coming THIS WEEKEND. So I thought I'd get everyone in the spirit by posting this flash I made last year. No, I'm not just lazily rehashing old cartoons, I'm creating my own Christmas tradition. Every year, me and my blogger peeps can gather around our computers for a showing of this, admittedly shoddily made, yet somewhat amusing, flashterpiece. Then get yea to the mall, there's not much time left!

Merry Christmas Everyone! (even if you're not Christian. Hey, I'm not Christian either).