Tonight we're going swimming at the Y with Becca and Drew and baby Aedan. This will be William's first time in a pool and will be a super exciting baby-book-worthy experience. But, problem, my body is completely different than the last time I donned a bathing suit. My gargantuan boobs were hard to fit even before they turned into udders. Plus, now I have these unsightly stretchmarks that make bikinis problematic.
Becca had offered to lend me a suit, but what if that one didn't fit? And when has anyone ever felt comfy in someone else's swimwear? The thought of trying on a hundred ill-fitting bathing suits at the mall across the street just about put me in tears, so I called my Mom. My Mom's the best. She came over right away and took me to La Feminique, the specialty shop on Plains Rd that sells bathing suits, bras and chocolate vaginas. The service there is fabulous. The lady there helped me find a suit that fit and covered my stretch marks for only 30 bucks. They were very sympthetic to my gargantuan boob situation. So I got a navy tankini that supports the girls and covers all my icky bits, well except my thighs but they'll be under water.
All this and everyone will be looking at baby anyway.
4 comments:
No one expects chocolate vaginas (and the Google bar spell checker will not allow the plural of vagina so one to a customer! (Apologies to Monty Python))
Seriously one of the reason I like reading you (besides the slice of life baby stories) is I never know what to expect.
One might wonder how you came to be searching for vaginas on google.
I, ah... uhm wasn't. Being dyslexic I make a lot of silly spelling errors and depend on the Google tool bar to keep me legible on the web. Yeah that's right! It also insists on Google being capitalized. All hail Google!
I don't have to search to find your quirky posts, my blog tells me when you have something new.
here is a blog about medical care women health pregnancy tubal reversal and vaginal diseases
http://www.mybabydoc.com/blog/
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