I sent this e-mail to Yoplait in response to that irritating commercial. If you haven't seen it, how nice for you. I forgot to say that I wish I was in the grocery store with the yoplait creamy guy, so I could throw a cantaloupe at him.
This is concerning your television commercial for yoplait creamy, which runs during coverage of the Olympic games. Congratulations. You have succeeded in creating the most annoying advertisement of all time. If I had never heard the words "Yum! Yum! Yum!" uttered in that fingers-on-the-blackboard, Satan-as-a-chipmunk voice, I would be a much happier person right now. I might even be eating a yoplait product. Unfortunately, the severe irritation from your ad has lead me to boycott all yoplait products until such time as they don't remind me of that hideous use of airtime.
Today on the subway I saw a half-naked guy wearing a Santa Claus hat. He was yelling "Hey girls! Check this out!" If he was in the same car as me it would have been creepy, but he wasn't, so it was funny. Clearly the guy was nuts. I mean, a Santa hat in the middle of February?
Today's Parent has given me something to write. A 200ish-word article about lice. And they're going to pay me too. Sweet. Won't quite cover my GO train tickets for the three months I'm there for, but it's the thought that counts. (Actually it's the writing credit that counts).
Descant magazine (that highly literary quarterly that is actually more like a book than a mag) called me. They picked someone else to be their intern (someone better than me?) but they were so gosh darn impressed with my résumé and interviewee skills that they want me to work for them in some capacity. I'll call them, but these volunteer jobs are going to put me in the poor house I tell you.
I stopped by the Disney Store. There's another place I should email. What once housed a fabulous selection of Snow White and Mickey memorabilia, has become an outlet for over-priced baby clothing. Very disappointing.